Its been bumpy May...enter June.

Where to start?

Our trip to Utah went well. Sakura was good both on the way out and back. Surprisingly no problems. Lots of people from the plane commented on how sweet and quiet she was. It was however exhausting going from one place to another with so much stuff. And she had allergy's which made her a bit of a fuss.

It was great seeing my family and some of my friends. I was a bit disappointed some of my friends that mentioned they wanted to see me never ended up contacting me. However my two good friends Amanda and Megan showed up for some grub at Corby's mother's restaurant; Bread Stix in Midway. Which I might add was delicious. :)

Then Amanda stayed over tell 1am chatting with my mother and I whilst I drank some wine. It was nice just to chat and relax. I actually got my mother to open up about some controversial subjects. Its interesting being an "adult" so to say and talking to your mother about what once were taboo subjects in the house. I got allot of perspective and I see my mother in a whole new light.

All and all it was a good trip and I wish we could have stayed longer. Hopefully sometime soon Bobby can join us next trip... Now here comes the reason I haven't felt like blogging for awhile. During our trip away my dear over working, paranoid * but in a cute way* husband was typing away on a document under our coffee table he was using as a desk. He had a sudden sharp pain in his spine which caused him to attempt to sit up. He did so quickly and came back down hitting the left side of his head on the corner of our very hard wooden coffee table. He fell back and couldn't get up for awhile. He had a headache but just pushed if off an a silly accident. But that silly accident turned into something much worse two days later. He wasn't feeling well so I was driving him to work. I drove myself back to work and moments after sitting down I get a call from him... lets just say I spent the majority of the day w/him in the ER. He had some kind of amnesia episode. Bad enough he couldn't remember me, where he lived,the current president, what year it was. It was bad. But as time progressed some of it came back to him. They did scans and an MRI. No internal damage was done that they could see. He's seen a neuroligst which wants to see him back for an EEG but now currently two weeks later he's about 90 %. He still feels there's holes in things here and there. The doctor can't really say what happen but that it was probably due to the concussion he had. They couldn't tell me if it would happen again either. Whatever it was, it was scary. For a short time I felt like I had lost my husband. Imagine the person you love the most having no idea who you are? Everything you've done together, been through, everything gone. Anyway, its taken some time to come down from this month to say the least. All my friends have been supportive and I thank those I haunted w/calls or txt. I hope this is the last of this we have to deal with.

Sakura was sent to Grandma P.'s for the Memorial day weekend and my husband and I took some much needed alone time. I finally got to see the new Star Trek movie. Which was awesome. Totally want to see it again. Young Spok was hot. And I love the uniforms.

I also went and see Angels and Demons w/my friend Anjella. That was a fun ladies night out however I was a little disappointed about the movie. But rarely does a movie surpass the book its based on so for what it was it was okay.

I've had to miss two Witchcraft 301 classes and one week our teacher was out on vacation. So I don't have anything new to report on that end. I started this class doing all the home work but have become a flunky the last few weeks due to all the crap that's been going on. I know eventually I'll have to retake the course. There is allot of material to cover and learn. But I've enjoyed it so far. Next class is on Runes I believe.

Lastly I'm currently working on loading all of Sakura's photos to an online data base for storage. I'm going to order prints finally and do a scrap book or two. I would have had one done by now but its been crazy. :) We finally have Sakura's new crib up and I don't think she likes it. The play and sleep she was in before had a little hoody that hung over it and the crib is nice and wide open in comparison. So I've had a few rough nights of crying but I think she's adjusting. I'll put photos up soon. So thats all for now. More soon.

Major update, sorry I've been out. ;)

I know I've been bad. I've not updated in a few weeks. But honestly I've just been so tired. I thought I was slowly dying for awhile until my blood test came back from the lab. Apparently I have hypothyroidism. Which sucks. Totally. It runs in the family though, my mother, her sister's and some of my female cousins have it. And poor Sakura, she'll have it probably because it runs in Bobby's family as well. Hypothyroidism basically means my thyroid isn't producing enough hormones to sustain my body to function properly. I get head aches, I'm constantly tired to the bone no matter what I do, dry skin, bad hair, muscle aches and cramps and the list goes on. Like I said I thought I was dying. They have a pill that gives me the hormones my body needs called snythroid. I will need to continue to take this pill for the rest of my life basically. And go in for blood test twice a year to make sure my dosage doesn't need upped. I have to avoid certains foods and I have to become more active and live a healthier life in order to maintain the "normal" that everyone else has with a regular thyroid. I've been reading a bunch about it. Apparently 1 in 50 women have it. And 1 in every 1000 for men. Oh did I mention it effects your moods too?...yeah anxiety, depression and bad memory. At least I have an excuse for being a bubble head now.

Now on to more plesant news. Sakura and I will be traveling to Utah next Thursday the 7th to Monday the 11th to visit my Family. I am looking forward to that. Lil nervous about the Swine Flu thing but we'll be wearing mask at the airport. And be using hand sanitizer like mad. And I may wear some latex gloves at the airport. I know, I know... Oh well better safe than sorry.

Beltane is tomorrow, I'll be celebrating that with my class tonight at Esoterica. (May Eve, April 30th-May 1st) Most important to pagans, save for Samhain, I don't know of any Pagan group that doesn't celebrate this holiday in some way. Beltane is the great Fertility rite of life, starting at dusk on the 30th and continuing until the dawn of the 1st. The union of the God and Goddess to conceive the sun-child to be takes place upon this holiday, no matter which tradition of paganism is involved. Beltane is the one holiday most discouraged by the Christians, who didn't even use it as a point for a holiday of their own because the power and nature of the day involved. Still, even in Christianized Ireland the May day dance of the Maypole remained, as did the giving of flowers to those you loved or cared for as friends. The Maypole is a symbol of the union of the God and Goddess to create life, the pole itself a phallic symbol while the dancers and their streamers or vines of flowers represent the fertile womb of the goddess . Besides the Maypole often a bonfire is present, and members of the group are encouraged to jump the flames for luck and their own fertility. Food, drink and love are the order of the evening. Beltane is the time of many marriages/handfastings in the pagan community (in some it is the point where one chooses to begin and end relationships of a physical nature). It is said that a child conceived on this day will grow up to wield great power and knowledge and to be healthier than upon any other. I've added a book on Beltane to Sakura's growing library.

Last, I'll leave with a picture of the adorable fairy costume I bought for Sakura for the fairy festival in Maryland on May 16th. I'll be going down with my friend Gina and her son Dylan on Saturday. And possibly with my Pagan meetup group on Sunday. It should be fun. I've bought some giant wings for myself and will be using a crazy wig as usual. ;)

*Cherry Blossom Festival '09* I'm baaack...with pictures to boot!

Cherry Blossom Festival '09

Amanda arrived around midnight, I'm not sure I don't remember. *LoL*
My husband was very sweet and went to pick her up for me. I told him I was going to sleep until my alarm went off. And I left my phone with him encase I slept through it. I woke up to Bobby poking at me and Amanda sliding into the bathroom across from me.






Following morning which was Friday, I woke up and got Sakura together and out w/Bobby. I showered, dressed and picked up a bit. And around 11 almost noon I thought I'd better wake Amanda up; who was still a sleep. * LoL* It was raining and a nasty day for the most part. We didn't get the car tell later so we kept close to town. I took her to one of our favorite restaurants Yens cafe. And then we ran some arrons. Later that night we went to Esoterica. Amanda picked up some cute yarn hairbands for the festival the next day and I purchased my teacher Irene's new CD "Cassandra Syndrome ; Of Patriots and Tyrants". Which was very good. I love the vocals in it. If your into operatic vocals or heavy metal I highly recommend it. Here's a link. http://www.cassandrasyndrome.com/patriots.htm

We headed home and Bobby and I proceeded to overload Amanda with books and CD's to take home. Then off to bed we went. The following morning, rougly 4 1/2 hrs later about 5 a.m. I woke up, showered and started to get dressed. Snuck in and got Amanda up. I wanted to do her hair which looked fabulous with the pigtails and yarn bands. Very harujuko. And the black roses added flare. I should have done pink eyebrows for myself but I didn't think to much about it tell afterwards. Oh well.

I didn't pack the baby up the night before like I should have which caused us to leave an hour late. But after only getting lost once, dropping Sakura off, heading to the metro and walking to the Mall. We managed to make it for some of the parade. :) Which was fun but disapointing. There were way too many high school bands. Bleh. Poor kids looked half frozen.


Speaking of frozen after we watched some of the parade we headed over to the Japanese Street Fair that had just got started. I immeditatly found some place to change clothing. I was FREEZING. I was so glad I was intelligent enough to pack an extra outfit incase it got cold. I'd packed a tattoo shirt which I wore underneath the kimono top ( might I add was NOT made with heavy chested women in mind) and then threw on my blue jeans over the black leggings. And to keep my wig down I brought my black gypsy/pirate/whatever you want to call it head wrap. Which I used the cherry blossom clip to secure the wrap down. So it stayed good and on all day. I looked like a Japanese Pirate...with a cherry blossom fetish. *LoL* Note to self: Buy Kimono for next year you cheap ass.

Amanda was in a good mood except she'd started to develop a wicked cough making her sound like a 50 yr old smoker. We were both tired and hungry at that point so we wiggled in and out through the food vendors and found some grub. We shared Soba noodles & broth, red bean cakes (so yummy) and an ume and pickled seaweed rice balls. After lunch/breakfast we headed off to do some shopping. There was SO much over priced Japanese stuff. I surf Japanese goods sites often and I'd seen allot of what they were selling was marked up double, if not triple what it was worth. I had to laugh though because it was selling. I did find a good buy. A beautiful porcelain geisha. She was about 15 inches tall and mounted on wood. She was only $20 dollars and they laid her in a box and banded it shut. So she stayed safe through the whole journey home. I'll take a picture and load it soon. Amanda bought some cherry blossom hair clips and other cherry blossom themed stuff and I picked up a cheap t-shirt for Bobby. I was tempted to a buy a stuffed bunny for Sakura but the girl has a bazillion stuffed animals already and she only drools on them right now. So maybe next year.

Once we had enough of the fair we walked to the Washington memorial. Which was quite a feat in and of itself. The crowds were thick like mash pit. And the traffic was jammed pack. After taking some cheesy photos in front of it we headed down to the Basin. Which is where a large amount of the cherry blossoms are. They ring the pond area around wrap around the memorials. We were going to walk to the Jefferson memorial but as you can see from the picture the mob there look horrendous and we were dead tired at that point. So we decided to call it early and head back. Which took a few hours. Because headed to a blocked metro entrance and had to go down a few blocks to wait in a large mob there. You couldn't even tell where the people started to go underground it was so crowded. And people were pushing and showing and acting crazy. The train ride home was relaxing and I almost fell sleep at one point. Poor Amanda was fading quick. Whatever she had caught was getting worse.

Once we arrived we found the car and left to pick up Sakura at grandma's. I changed there, that kimono was annoying when it came to moving your arms. And Bobby's parents loaded us up on water for the trip home. We were so dehydrated. Which was bad...but neither of us had to use the port-a-potties at the Mall. :)


As soon as we made it home. We melted for awhile...then picked up and got some sushi at Naruto. Bobby had though Amanda would like it because it was Japanese food and one of our favorite places for sushi. But Amanda actually hates Japanese food for the most part. Foreign food in general. :) That's my all American Amanda for you. *LoL* I personally could live on anything but American. Too bland for my taste but then I like my food spiced and exotic. We arrived home from the restaurant and crashed. We all went straight to bed. I woke up about 5 am the next morning to wake Amanda up. We had purchased tickets for a cruise around the Potomac river to see the blossoms. But she was too tired and still sick. And frankly I was dead too. So we slept in. We spent her last day kicking it around town. We stopped at the local anime shop and the Barnes and nobles. I picked up a new tarot deck. Which I like allot more. And find it much easier to read then the herbal one. And that night Amanda packed and left around 4-5 am the next morning. Over all it was a good weekend. I was very happy to see and spend time with my dear friend. However next time she's down hopefully she'll have more time to do the tourist thing. And we can check out all the museums and monuments together. And perhaps Sakura will be old enough not to cause too much trouble. ;)

My friend Alfred later that day at work recommended I try MeadowLark Botanical Gardens. Which we did this Easter Sunday. I think next year I'll be going here for our cherry blossom viewing. It was gorgeous. Beautiful blossoms and flowers everywhere. Places to open a blanket an lay down. And very...very....empty! It was like a mini paradise. We'd have stayed longer if the wind didn't pick up and force out. We did have time to lay by the pond and watch the swans. They came right up to us. I could have reached out and touched them they were so close. Sakura had big eyes and was smiling. She LOVES duckies. At least the yellow kind in the bathtub. ;) I've got allot of pictures in this blog. From St.Patricks day, Ostara, the Festival, meadowlark and some pictures of Sakura in some of my old baby clothes. Promise future blogs will be less crowded. And if you want to see more pictures take a look at my facebook albums. I have them all posted there. :)

Blossoms on the Horizon...

So I am looking forward to this weekend... have I mentioned that? lol Amanda is set to come in around midnight on Thursday (yay red eye!). She'll be bunking on the couch while I take up residence on the chase in Sakura's room. I've made sure to stock up on her living necessities (Dr.Pepper) .

Unpleasant news about Friday. Its suppose to rain!
And Friday was going to be the day I took Sakura to see the blossoms. Which have just hit stage 5 ( See picture) . So she may or may not join us on Sunday for that. We'll be dropping her off to school and probably trolling around some local places like Esoterica and some shopping. No point in killing ourselves walking D.C. if Saturday and Sunday are suppose to be sunny. *knock on cherry wood ;) *

My kimono jacket has come in but I missed the delivery so I'll have to pick it up at the post office one of these nights. It's so difficult when I don't have a car and Bobby's usually late getting home.
I really hope it fits. I'm not even close to my pre-pregnant size but >.<)/ I'm on my way!

The wig I got in is REALLY cute. I'm glad I chose the short one instead of the long one. Its a convenient head cover for the sun that will be out. My poor cotton candy hair just doesn't do much for protection.

Sakura learned a new trick on Sunday. She screams like someone has stepped on her foot. She likes do do this just for fun. And sometimes when she wants food. Evil, evil baby.

Anyway, Saturday we'll be in D.C. on the mall for the parade and Japanese street festival. We'll be easy to spot if anyone else is going to be out there.

I'm going to try one of the peddle things on the nasty pond by the memorial. They look fun. And Sunday we'll be doing a Cherry Blossom River Tour . It takes passengers around the blossoms in West Potomac Park (rarely seen by land-lubbers), along the great monuments and then arriving at the Jefferson Tidal Basin. I'll be taking lots of pictures and posting them on my Facebook and few on here. I'll be doing an anti-rain dance tell then. ;)

Astrology ...

So nothing too eventful this week. *knock on wood*
Sakura is fully recovered, *knock on wood*
I'm starting to feel a little better *knock on wood*
Bobby doesn't seem to have caught the bug
*knock on wood* . lol

I took Sakura last night with me to class because Bobby had to have quite to focus on work. She was very well behaved surprisingly. She was full of smiles and laughs, turned on the charm as usual. Did not fuss tell the very end when she was tired. So I popped her in her car seat and rocked her to sleep.

This weeks class was on basic astrology. I learned some interesting facts. Did you know when you read your horoscope your reading your Sun Sign? Which is how you present yourself to the world around you. But not who you emotionally are on the inside.

A long time back when the New York Times were first about to print horoscopes in the paper they decided to put the Sun Sign in instead of the Moon sign because it was shorter. The Moon sign is usually longer, pages longer and goes into detail about who you are on the inside. I didn't know that. Here are pieces of my Astrology chart. There are more planets and descriptions that mean things but these are the basic.

My sun sign :

Sun is in 15 Degrees Scorpio.

Intense and complex by nature, you have extremely strong emotional reactions to most situations. Feelings are often very difficult for you to verbalize. Therefore you have a tendency to be very quiet - - to brood and think a lot. You seldom get overtly angry, but, when you do, you are furious and unforgiving. When you make an emotional commitment, it is total -- you are not attracted to superficial or casual relationships. If you are challenged, you take it as a personal affront and tend to lash out and fight back in a vengeful manner. You love mysteries and the supernatural. A good detective, you love getting to the roots of problems and you enjoy finding out what makes other people tick. You are known to be very willful, very powerful and quite tenacious!

My moon sign :

Moon is in 09 Degrees Taurus.

Warmth, comfort, security and familiar surroundings are necessary for you to feel at ease. Very loving and affectionate, you prefer a steady, patterned way of life. Patient, calm and steadfast, you are not easily upset. Others look to you for support. You tend to be a slow starter and a slow mover -- others may try to rush you, but they will never succeed. Emotionally, you are quite stubborn -- your attitudes about people and things were firmly set in your youth and will change very little as an adult. You are also very cautious and conservative about spending money. It is not that you are selfish, you just need to feel secure. Beware of a tendency to become overly complacent and too self-satisfied.

If you get a chart with a Node in it, it means that this is what you should aim towards being more like.

My Node :

N. Node is in 27 Degrees Taurus.
It's not in your nature to seek out many casual acquaintances in your daily round of activities. You feel much more comfortable with a small, close-knit group of people -- those with whom you can relax and work toward known and clearly defined goals. Your loyalty to a person or group, once given, is forever -- you'll expend all of your quite considerable energy in seeing that the group stays together and prospers. You choose your partners and relationships so carefully that you're bound to gain certain advantages from them, including those of a material nature. Be careful though not to let mere self-service be your motivation in establishing your connections -- make sure that there's an even give-and-take!

Check out this site, you can get a good summary on yourself for free.

http://alabe.com/freechart/

It works better if you know the specific time you were born at.

Long week....

It's been a long, rough week. Sakura caught Influenza and was full blown sick Wednesday the 18th. I had to take three days off of work. Her temperature kept jumping randomly and even got up 104 once. She'd cling to me like a kawala and if I tried to move her at all she'd squeal like a banshee. She didn't sleep much during the day or at night. She didn't eat much. She'd throw up. And she had a very stuffy congested nose. Which I was constantly sucking snot out of so she's get some air.

I am learning what the definition of Mom is. With Bobby sick and no family around. I had no one to relieve me if I was too tired or stressed. In a way its a bit like being a single mother. And I truly feel for single mothers now. Having made it out of the haze of this week of sickdom I know I've come out with future knowledge and more stamina but it was a hard, hard learning experience. I sat and thought about how my mother must have done this a million times for my brother, sister and I . And have new respect for her.

I went online and ordered a ticket for May 7th-11th to go down and visit my family. Especially my mom for mother's day. I'm even going to suck it up and attend mother's day at her church. So she has the opportunity to show her granddaughter off. I figured Sakura is too young to be impressionable and it would make my mom happy. Although the thought of stepping in side a Mormon church gives me the willys. Oh well, like I said this is for mom.

Happy Ostara!

Today is Ostara although I celebrated with my class yesterday at Esoterica in Leesburg. It was wonderful to get out after being in the house for two days without the internet, taking care of a very sick baby and dazing out from sleep deprivation.

For our ritual we started by opening a standard circle, calling the corners and elements, chanting and what not and then we wrote a goal we wished to work on this year on a piece of paper. Which we folded, lite on fire and then dropped it in a small pot we had planted seeds in. Our teacher then smashed the ashes with her athame (small sword) into the soil of the pot. So that as the plant grows we can focus and remember our goal. After we closed the circle we munched on chocolate and pastry. I was surprised though not many people brought stuff to share. My hazelnut eggs were popular. Which I'm glad because they were eaten and less temping to me. lol I bought a book about Ostara for Sakura when she's a little older. I plan on doing that for each of the eight Sabbats. It was fun and I'll post a cute story our teacher told us as soon as I dig it up. Here's a little description about Ostara for those who aren't familiar with it.

Ostara takes place on the Spring Equinox and is the second spring festival. It is a celebration of rebirth, renewal and fertility as the Mother Goddess has returned to her maiden status and reunites with the young God; together they plant the seeds of the coming year in her womb. Although this festival doesn't have a strong historical connection, it is traditionally the time the ground is prepared and the early, harder crops are planted. In modern times is a time when projects are organized and set into motion.

As a time of balance of not only day and night, but of the masculine and feminine energy, it is a time for new beginnings or revitalizing old projects. Many prosperity rituals are performed on this day as a way of connecting personal success to the fertility of the seasons. As the days grow longer and the crops grow to eventually bear fruit, so shall the person be blessed with their needs and wants being granted.

Celebrations include lighting fires, ringing bells and hard-boiled eggs. The eggs represent the Goddess of Fertility. The whites represent the feminine, while the yoke represents the masculine. Eggs were gathered to be used as talismans or ritually eaten as a fertility blessing. This day is also special to the Goddess Eostre; her patron animal was the hare. The hare and rabbit's represent fertility and prosperity.

Using many of the traditional pagans symbols and traditions, Christians created Easter. Although there are several differences in the traditions, the primary focus is on rebirth and growth.

Saint Patricks Day

Saint Patrick's Day is celebrated worldwide by the those of Irish descent and increasingly by non-Irish people (usually in New Zealand, Australia, and North America). Celebrations are generally themed around all things Irish and, by association, the color green. Both Christians and non-Christians celebrate the secular version of the holiday by wearing green, eating Irish food, Irish stout, Irish Whiskey or Irish Cream and attending parades.

And or getting drunk and acting stupid!
I personally like to celebrate by dressing up like a dork and running around bar hopping. Here's a picture from '07 when I was a leprechaun. '08 I was out preggie and well I might sneak out for a mojito or two this year but nothing grand. *sigh* Responsibility sucks sometimes. Hm, I think I look good as a redhead.

I'm...

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby
What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five
I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be quite alright
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is flicking a cigarette
And what it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving the peace sign
I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby

And what it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is playing the piano
And what it all comes down to my friends
Is that everything's just fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is hailing a taxi cab...

Debating...

I purchased this kimono jacket for the cherry blossom festival and also for me to wear in pictures with Sakura. I was going to go with a full length kimono and obi but decided against it this year. With her so little and all the walking we intend to do, something more flexible and light would probably be best. Now what I'm currently debating is wig or no wig? I am digging on this little pink and white bob, its dirt cheap. I had an artisan from Etsy.com create a portrait cherry blossom hat for Sakura but the blossoms just don't look right on the hat. Since they come on a clip I was thinking of attaching them to my hair instead. Or in this case the wigs hair. I'm hoping my friend Amanda will be able to come down and join us for the festival. She's really into the Japanese culture and Anime. So having her along would make it more fun. And I haven't seen her in ages. The carrier you see above is a Babyhawk carrier and so far I like it. Its very comfortable but Sakura is still too little right now to carry on the back. I think by April 4th she might be able to try again. If not I'll front pack her. The carrier I have is black with the front patch a blue/pink cherry blossom spray. ;)